My Love Hate Relationship

We all have experienced a love hate relationship at some point in our lives.  My current love hate relationship is with Twitter.  Like most people who are involved in social media at some point, when Twitter was born I was in like flint.  I didn’t really “get it” and thought it was kinda pointless to tell people “what I was doing” all the time… but I went along for the ride and as it evolved and it became more of a communication tool I fell in love with it…

Then things happened in my life and Twitter was used to hurt me, to drive stakes into my heart so to speak.  I hated it at that time.  I drew back and made my account private.  I screened my followers and the people I was following  ruthlessly.  I just didn’t have the passion for it any more.

Then life changed yet again, I had a great set of Twitter friends who loved and supported me through the good and the bad.  I was private, I had the control.  We all know that Twitter was my lifeline during the early weeks of Kade’s life.  So I fell in love with Twitter again.

I felt confident enough to open my account again so that I could connect with more mothers, and expand the world of advise and support.  But lately, I don’t know, there is *something* that is making me fall out of love with Twitter again.  An underlying passive aggressiveness.  Sometimes a very blatant sense of aggressiveness.  Not towards me directly.  But amongst the realm of the world I “live” in on Twitter.  Too much “know it all attitude” that hurts feelings and people lashing back.  Too many underlying barbs and nastiness.  There is very much a gang like mentality brewing where when a disagreement occurs between one or two people, a pack is formed and sides are taken and maliciousness is spewed forth.

It’s become a place where it’s seemingly acceptable to just say whatever you want without any regard to the other person’s feelings and I’m not really comfortable with that.  I don’t know what it is about the anonymity of the internet that makes people think it’s ok to behave in that manner.  I seriously doubt that anyone would actually behave that way face to face unless seriously pushed towards the edge… so why do we think it’s ok to behave this way on the internet?

I’m finding myself pulling back from Twitter again.  Trying to quiet the voices that are all clamouring to purge themselves in a negative manner.

Maybe I’ll fall back in love with Twitter again, but for now, I’m again in a hate place of my relationship with it.  Perhaps a sign that it’s time to give it a skip altogether?

What do you think about Twitter at the moment?

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17 thoughts on “My Love Hate Relationship

  1. I have been thinking for a long time that Twitter has become very negative. People are using it to complain about every aspect of their life in hope that someone will respond. I agree people are more agressive and dont think before they push the Tweet button. I am very frustrated with some of the moms who use it as a platform to complain about how hard life is and how much pain they going through with their baby. It is not what it used to be where people just merely asked for advice on certain aspects. It is more about moaning. If I log onto to Twitter twice a day at the moment it is a lot. Where I used to enjoy it, I now just feel negative energy when I am on it. I am with you in the love/hate relationship thing. Thanks for the nice blog.

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  2. Hmm, I too have had a love hate relationship with Twitter. In the beginning I also didn’t get it but as my network of Mommies (and twin mommies especially) built up I became more ‘into’ it. Some days I really wonder why I waste my time on it and other days I wonder how I would manage a mini crisis in mommyville (i.e. temperature, sleep issues etc) without it.

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    • Nita, that’s just it, Twitter saved my bacon in those early weeks with Kade and I have become very fond of many of my Twitter friends. I’m just finding the negative is by far outweighing the positive right now and I don’t want that negativity to impact on my very good frame of mind at the moment. Hopefully the break I’m taking will help. xxx

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  3. No seriously..i wrote this huge long response to your blog..and the damn thing got deleted…grrrrrr..

    Basically I was saying I do not have a twitter account..do not get the whole concept. I have facebook and a blog…and that is more than enough for me

    Enjoy your love/hate relationship…one day it will all fall into place

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  4. I am not sure I agree or disagree – I have never found it to negatively affect me so I just carry on regardless and often just post and dont pay much attention to the rest of the people.

    D and I met on twitter so it will always have a special place in my heart and I think its why he cant close his account either even though is never on!

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  5. I have had my twitter account for years now.

    But I have been out of it since April ’12. I seem to keep falling off from it too. I am not able to form the kind of relationships on it, the way I have on FB or other places. And it does not excite me anymore.

    BTW, it is not acceptable ‘anywhere’ to drive needles into someone. Just block the people who are bugging you. It should not be like that at all.

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  6. In all honesty, I have noticed that you have been somewhat scarce , I miss your tweets but understand that with all social media, we get to a point where we want a break. I can’t say that I really see the nasty sides of things, but then again, I am very picky with regards as to who I follow (maybe also not picky enough).

    I do get annoyed sometimes because some people find it OK to laugh or ridicule the same subjects and people all the time. But for the most part, it’s OK. I’ve never loved it or Facebook. But I get attached to the online friends a little.

    That lifeline of communication for me outside of my house. Because I am a loner, introvert, call me what you will. So I do enjoy the communication.

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    • Well that is what I’m finding Tam, that I perhaps need to “vet” who I follow a bit better cos I’ve noticed that I’ve ended up following people who are in similar Twitter circles so to speak and some of those people I am finding hard to “mesh” with. Does that makes sense? And I’ve also noticed that ppl ridicule and laugh at the same ppl or situations over and over and over – like it might have been funny once but enough already… That said I do value the advise and support I’ve gotten from my online friends and also have become very fond of many of them and don’t really want to let them go… Here’s hoping my little step back will help clear the noise in my head. xxx

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  7. No Twitter, only FB and the blogs I follow. I seriously wouldn’t find the time to fit in another social network device. Hope you find some peace as to the way forward.

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  8. I know EXACTLY what you mean. I LOVE it and the connection that it brings. I can’t stand the ugliness and the cat fights and the passive-aggressive stuff. I can’t do the negativity. I am hardly on it these days because I find it draining. I think that I last went there on Sunday for maybe 5 minutes.
    I hope that I can fall in love with it again at some point. Because if it is used correctly and if people can be less nasty then it has the ability to change the world.

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  9. I find when I am working (i.e. not on leave) I have very little time for twitter – it is frustrating, it feels like I am out of the loop. But maybe all that is a blessing in disguise?

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  10. I registered on twitter ages ago and spent less than 2 minutes on it and decided it was a bad idea. Keeping up with FB and a blog is time consuming enough and I know me, I would probably get sucked up into it too. I hope you manage to sort out your love / hate relationship with it and either reconcile and break-up, totally depending on which one will benefit you more 🙂

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  11. Its not my favorite right now – I do enjoy the immediate responses that you can gather, but its also taken away from blogging for a lot of people.

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