I’ll start off by saying that I’m going to post something on this here blog that is more than likely going to piss my husband off. I honestly want UNBIASED opinions here and will not tolerate any husband bashing – no matter how much you all love and adore me – OK?
My husband has been considering buying a bicycle for a few months now. He wants a mountain bike. This consideration has stepped up in the last few weeks (in my opinion) because his brother and his brother’s wife have entered one of the most prestigious cycling races hosted in Johannesburg – the 94.7 Cycle challenge. Cliff used to be an avid cyclist in his younger years and has completed a few Argus Cycles tours etc. He was good at it. So because I saw he was hankering after it I told him that if he really wanted to he must look into buying a bike. Big mistake – in hindsight I really should have outlined what I thought was reasonable from the outset…
Today I got an email from him at work saying he was popping past a cycle store to have a look at bikes. I immediately called him to ask if he was going into said store to buy a bike and would I come home to one later this evening? (Cases in point – he has told me he is looking at a car and twice has come home with said car without me knowing he purchased the cars so his history is not so great on this side of things). He said no. He held up to his word. I never came home to a bike.
BUT I did come home to an argument. Because he has seen / found a bike he likes. It is a middle of the range bike and it costs R7000.00 ($636 at an exchange of R11.00 to the dollar). I think this is an unnecessarily excessive expense for a hobby he is not 100% sure he’ll get back into. I feel he should consider shopping around for a second hand or entry level bike in the price range of about R3500.00 to R4000.00 ($363 @ same exchange) and see whether he is as into cycling as he used to be. If he is into it he can always upgrade his bike at a later stage.
His argument is that he feels like he deserves to spend “a little” money on himself. That all our money has gone into fertility this year and he deserves to spoil himself (I do agree that some spoiling is needed, no arguement there, my resistance is the extent of the spoiling at hand). That he never does anything or buys anything for himself (he plays golf every second weekend – and I know he is going to explode that I’ve mentioned this but the fact of the matter is that he has not been at all prepared to comprimise at all on his spending in this area).
There are other factors at play here which I’m not sure I’ll get into right now on this blog, but the fact remains that I feel if we are supposed to be saving for our next treatment that an excessive expense is not called for right now.
Yes I freely admit that I have also spent unecessarily on myself recently by going to the day spa with the girls at a cost of R1100.00 ($100) and have recently bought some clothes that were not needed but more in the way of retail therapy and a “like to have”. I feel guilty for spending this money which would have been better spent in my opinion towards our IVF and our future children and family as much as I enjoyed my time at the spa and will no doubt enjoy the clothes.
He thinks I’m being a selfish bitch*bit unreasonable by thinking the seven grand is excessive. So what do you think internets? Am I the voice of reason or am I being a selfish bitch tad unreasonable?
* my words not his – he does not swear at me – well he did it once and got into so much trouble from his parents that he does not do that anymore… in fact we try not swear AT each other at all during fights. We – read me – swear at the situation a lot but I really cannot remember a tie where we’ve sworn AT each other…