Already?

Sjoe, it’s been a whirlwind two days.

Yesterday’s scan revealed all my follies growing nicely sitting at between 15 and 16+ mm (he measured about 4 per ovary) and told me that there is a “decent” second cohort growing on each side as well.  He told me to keep the water flowing freely and asked if I was feeling fine.  I said yes,  a little uncomfy but just fine thanks.  Then he dropped the E2 bomb on me – my E2 on Friday was 7000.  That me dears is high.  So he sent me off to the vampires lab to have another E2 done and told me he would call with further instructions once the results were in.  E2 yesterday had climbed to 11 500 odd – holy cow!  So I had 1 x amp of menopur and 1 x cetrotide for the day.

I then spent the day at The Rhema children’s Village in town.  What a great day.  This home started nearly 20 years ago as a small shelter where homeless kids could sleep for the night and have  a meal.  It is now a registered home which hosts up to 75 children at a time.  The kids were amazing and I sat on my knee’s and weeded the gardens with them.  When it came time to have a tour the kids were SO proud of their home and their rooms and what they are making of themselves, they showed us their report cards from school and were such well-mannered, well-adjusted kids that my heart and soul were both totally restored.  I’m definitely getting more involved there in future.  I loved my time there and of course the bear hugs I got from the kids just were the cherry on the top of an amazing day.

Then off this am to the clinic again for yet another early morning scan.  Lawrence scanned me (he was The Lone Ranger today – Stephan is doing the 94.7) and actually called me a chicken.  Asked me if I was clucking when I talked.  He’s such a card – what a honey!  He said I had “plench” of follies and that they were all doing well.  They are sitting at 18+mm today.  I’ve had another E2 and Progesterone blood test done this am and that means it’s time…

TRIGGER TIME!  I’m triggering with lucrin, so need to take 40ml at 20h00 tonight and then another 40ml tomorrow morning at 08h00.  ER is set for Tuesday morning at 08h00.  Interestingly, Lawrence told me that when they trigger girls (mostly PCOS patients) with lucrin it is way more “natural” than triggering with ovidrel or pregnal etc.  This helps them combat the dreaded over stim (OHSS).  So, as much as I still need to drink water like there is no tomorrow, we’re hopeful that the lucrin trigger will also keep the OHSS at bay…

Holy smokes y’all!  I cannot believe that it’s ER time already.  This cycle has literally flown and I just can’t believe it.  But I’m still feeling good.  I’m still positive that this one is going to be THE one.

What a ride it’s been up till now!

Follie Gosh!

So the scan this morning was good

My lining is at 8.4mm and we have follies.  Lots and lots of follies.  Probably around 6 – 8 per ovary all at 11+mm.  I administered 2 amps of menopur and 1/2 a cetrotide today, will have 2 amps menopur & a full cetrotide tomorrow and have been told to up the fluid intake to a minimum of 4 litres per day to try and combat the ever lurking OHSS…

So I’m happy cos clearly my PCOS ovaries are responding well to the stim and my lining is looking really good this early in the game. 

I scan again on Friday morning.

What was I supposed to think?

One thing I can say about this cycle is that it is leaving me feeling exhausted – all the early mornings are not good for my constitution (I am a night owl, not a early morning budgie) and I went to bed reasonably early last night.  As normal, I turned my phone onto silent knowing that if for some reason anyone had an emergency that they could call on our land line to wake us up.  Well this morning I see that I have two missed calls from my cousin, Mark and a text message saying “I no longer have a girlfriend…”

My heart stopped – I love Cindy!  She is already part of the family and I could not believe that they had broken up, so at 05h30 in the morning I sent him a text explaining why I never called him last night and saying how sorry I was to hear the news and asking if he was OK and if there was ANYTHING I could do to help them… So I get a call at about 06h30 from him and I’m like a mother hen asking what happened and how is he etc… So he puts me in my place and says “Why are you assuming the worst?  All I said is that I no longer have a girlfriend…” and at that time about ten million pennies dropped – They had got engaged over the weekend!  Not broken up!  Commited and solidified!  Naturally I am super happy for them and told him that, but man, don’t I feel like an arse?

I guess that is one thing that I hate about infertility.  The fact that after being in this ringer for a while, one tends to think naturally of the worst that could happen… or is it just a human trait?? Perhaps it was the way he worded his sms and the fact that he called so late (about 23h00) to give the good news, but man, why did my mind automatically think bad news?  The fertiles in my family all got the engaged vibe immediately, but not Dumbass Sam…  Will I ever automatically look for the silver lining again?  I don’t know, but I sure hope so.

In other news, my follies grew like beans over the weekend!  Scan this morning showed 3 -4 follies on the left ovary sitting at between 18 – 20 mm and 2 or so on my right in the same growth range.  Lining is at 10mm and doc is happy with that.  Had some more drugs (cetro & menopur cocktail) this morning and back tomorrow for another scan to see if I can receive trigger shot tomorrow… Egg retrieval either Thursday or Friday!  Crikey Moses, this is real people!  Egg Retrieval!!!

The Secret Pain

Yet another early morning start for me today to check on the follies, so I was up (again) before sparrows fart, getting showered and dressed for my date with dildo cam, and my heart was feeling good.  My ovaries have been aching dully so I know that they are doing something in there, whether it is a party going on or not is anyone’s guess, but that ache re-assures me.

Driving to the clinic, the sun started coming up and hit the clouds just so, making them pink and shiny and tinged with just the right amount of orange gold, it really took my breath away and I thought to myself how blessed I was to have woken up early enough on such a stunning day to see that sun rise and kiss the clouds.

I got to the clinic settled in for a wait and got chatting to my friend Sharon (making lots of noise the two of us were in the normally hushed rooms) when in walked a couple with their little girl, who could not have been more than 2 or 3 years old.  It was one of those moments, you know the ones where the whole moment freezes and it continues in super slo mo?  Every eye was on that little girl, she was super cute and had this blonde hair and the biggest baby blues you have ever seen… she tottered into the waiting room, stood at the table and eyed Shaz and I… At one stage I was petrified that she would walk over to me and touch me, touch me in my fertlity clinic of all places.  While I coud appreciate exactly how cute she was and how lucky her parents were to have her (assuming that they battled to have her in the first place considering where they had just walked into) I had this little secret pain in my heart.  There standing before me was the object of my hearts desire, a real live beautiful child.  Oh how it hurt to see what could be, what is going to be but is not yet realised.  Thankfully I was called for my scan, and I could escape the secret pain of that stunning little tyke. 

 

PS –>  leading follie was 14mm so I started the combination of menopur and cetrotide today, shoot up again tomorrow and then back on Monday for follie check.  Lining still the same at 9.5mm… Looking good good looking

Slow & Steady Wins the Race…

Today I was reminded of the story of the Hare and the Tortoise, you know the one where the hare is like the mouse that shouts “aireeba aireeba” but it too overconfident and eager and falls asleep and ends up losing the race to the tortoise who ran the race at a slow and steady pace? 

Why you ask?  Because my follies have decided that slow and steady wins the race…  Todays scan was ok – good actually considering that I am only on CD 11 of this IVF cycle… Lining was measuring at a nice healthy 9.5mm and I have two leading follies on the left measuring 12mm and two leading follies on the right as well also measuring 12mm…

…But I was kinda hoping for more?  Were my expectations too high?  It was just that after such a great response to the clomid (without the monster making an appearanc nogall) I was riding the high wave. Only to be dunked by today’s scan…  Lovely Doctor is happy cos as he so rightly said it is still early days yet.

So scan diagnosis is good… we’ll stick with good.

Had another 2 amps of menopur this morning, and have steadily aching ovaries so hopefully the other follies will be late bloomers and catch up.  Back bright and early tomorrow for another scan to check out the progress, if the leading follies are at 14mm, I start with cetrotide as well as the menopur until trigger for ER.

Just another day of slow and steady, cos this is one race I definitly want to win and will be doing my best not to muck it up by being too much of an eager beaver.